Why I Hate The Big Bang Theory

No, not the creation of the universe Big Bang Theory. The wildly popular TV sitcom that ran on CBS for 12 seasons. 

I remember when TBBT began. I was in college. My quirky self had heard about about a new show centering on a bunch of bright, nerdy, young adults. I was so excited to watch it. Let's delve a little into the past to understand why. 

My whole life I had been "different." I am creative, artistic, bright. But also, spacey, loud, goofy. I've never had a problem with finding friends because I am beyond extroverted and will literally talk all day, even if it is to myself. Though I made many friends when I was young, I always suspected people were laughing at me instead of with me. Fortunately, it never bothered me because most of the time, I preferred to be alone drawing or doing other artsy things. 

I learned at a young age, 10 to be exact, that even though I was friends with the popular girls, I was not like them. They teased me behind my back, which I found out from an actual, kind friend at the time. Eventually by middle school, I began to find my people. These were the JNCO Jean, dog-collar wearing kids of the early 2000s. Artistic, anime and heavy metal-loving weirdos. My kind of people.

By high school, pressure by my mom to excel in school pushed me into higher level classes. Many of my "goth friends" went to the local trade high-school, so I became closer with my higher academic achieving friends (AKA the nerds). I felt at home with these people. Bright, sarcastic, silly, genuine, Star Trek and Pokémon loving kids. Heck, I loved them so much, I eventually married one. We've been married for 11 years and I told him he better not die because I couldn't tolerate living with anyone else. 

Back to TBBT. I was thrilled to see quirky, bright, people represented. My kin, my friends. 

Well, I was pretty annoyed when I saw it. This sitcom was another trope against the wonderful people in my life. This was NOT the accurate interpretation I was craving. It was another, "Oh, my God. Nerds are SO weird. And look how they are fawning over that cute, blonde, tan girl. Gross" misrepresentation. Side note - for those neurotypical/allistic individuals reading this post, most nerdy/bright neurodivergent dudes would not find Penny to be all that impressive. They definitely would not be ogling her like the characters did in TBBT. I don't speak for all neurodivergent hetero guys when I say this, but if you took a poll, an edgier, Natalie Portman type would win like 98% of the time. Anyway, it was another Revenge of the Nerds style nerds-are-alien-lifeforms, depiction. 

Fast forward to my married life/kids (current) era of adulthood. I was diagnosed with depression and inattentive ADHD. In hindsight, this was no big surprise. I had just become accustomed to crying multiple times a week and being so paralyzed by my overwhelmed brain since I was 13 that I thought it was normal. There are a lot of other still unexplainable quirks, which I attribute to autism. I figure I'm right about that diagnosis too, considering I correctly predicted the ADHD. 

With those realizations, on top of my oldest being formally diagnosed with autism at 2.5 years old, and the wonderful world of Twitter bringing up TBBT today, I can clearly articulate why I became a children's book author/illustrator.  

Shows like The Big Bang Theory fuel my why. I am writing a children's series based on true events in my neurodivergent family. I refuse to stop looking for agent representation until it is published. I am choosing to go the traditional route because I want our series to reach as many families as possible. I am passionate about autistic and ADHD voices being represented in a realistic, unexaggerated way. I want all children, autistic or allistic, to pick up a book about a family and realize that fixation on a specific topic, fear of haircuts, or any other topic discussed is part of someone else's reality. It does not make them strange or alien-like, it makes them human. 

Neurodivergence is not less. It is just a brain that works differently than the norm. I want a world where there isn't a cringy laugh track or sad, pensive music when we talk about autistic lives. Autistics don't need more jokes or pity. They need acceptance.